I’m a firm believer that what you think you create. You believe yourself to be this way or that; you envision how others see you even though you’re most likely wrong. Maybe you feel that you’re undeserving of what truly brings you joy.
I believe that if you feel deep down that everything you dream about you can and will be your reality, it will be. At the same time, if you continue to think it’ll happen someday, somehow, but the work feels less important today.. count yourself out. The work, the passion, the tenacity are all requirements to fulfilling the voids inside of you.
It took me an absorbent amount of time to understand that no one will hold my hand down the road to being happy. That no matter how much I think I can, I also can’t expect change without changing my expectations. For as long as I remember, I would live my life with this idea that one day I’ll have it all.. the 1956 Chevy Corvette, the dream life, idyllic relationship, perfect career that I never tired of. But what I didn’t account for was the work, the failure, the doing-it-alone kind of thing. I guess I just hoped that someone would feel obliged to guide me in the direction that would lead to ultimate happiness and I could just live it! I know, I know it’s ridiculous. But when you’re dreams and ideals mix, they don’t always come out with the same sense of reality.
Here I am.. years later chipping away at the moment. Living my life as I know I should have.. doing the work necessary to get where I want to be. I’ve had to remind myself daily that failure is not an option. (Don’t get me wrong.. failure is part of life. It’s inevitable. But it doesn’t have to STOP you!). I like reeling in the fact that I do not have to accept a NO as an answer. That for every decline of my service, for every NO that I hear, I am one step closer to a YES!
I don’t know about you, but I’ve let this stop me for so many years. I heard a NO and I backed down. I didn’t pursue something that wasn’t reciprocated. I took rejection personally, as if I was told NO based on something I did instead of the other’s opinion conflicting with my own. It’s possible that they didn’t need what I was offering at that time. Or that what I have to offer was too different from what they want. The list could go on and on. There’s no reason the hash it out now. It won’t change the past, but what it does do is show me that I need to change my process. Go about it a different way. Try something new and out of my comfort zone. Just because I’ve never tried it doesn’t mean it won’t work, right?
For instance, I recently applied to become a Brand Ambassador for Just Strong. With a similar core message, values and path for our future, I felt this would be a perfect fit for me. I was very excited to hear that I was accepted and am able to do something that I’ve never done before. I’m getting myself one step closer to accomplishing things I had never dreamed of.. all while plugging a positive sense of purpose, resiliency and empowerment to the women of the world.
When you sit down and think of why you feel the way you do, why that one image of yourself sticks with you, where you want to be, where your future is going.. is haunting you? Do you feel that a positive outcome is there for you? Or do you feel sucked into the mundane with little to no way out? Get up! Figure it out! Make this life yours!
Listen, I have goals. I have an ambition that is insanely fired up. Sometimes I can’t sleep because I’m thinking of my next step, my next Masterclass, my next business venture. I can’t say this enough.. if I can do this so can you!
Here’s a bit of insight for those who don’t know me personally. I’m a mom of two kids, I have no college degree (even though I attended for years!), I haven’t held a real job since 2011 and, if I’m being frank, I just can’t take it anymore. I’ve started over and over again with this idea that this is it! I’m going to get off my ass and start my life. I’m going to be ME! I’m going to fulfill every dream I’ve ever had.. all at once.
Let me tell you.. I’ve failed. Big time! My passport is a sorry excuse for a book of pages. My list of dreams has faded over the years from being shoved deep inside my pocket. My friends and family know of my dreams and desires and are more conscious of my push-off than I am. Honestly, it’s sad. I’m closing in on forty years old and I haven’t done one thing I said I would.
BUT, here’s what I have done (and THIS is what you need to remind yourself of):. I have two amazing kids. I have moved several times giving me the opportunity to see many places throughout the US that I otherwise wouldn’t have seen. I’ve made so many beautiful relationships through the years, ones that I’ll cherish forever. I have the best family a person can as for. I have a French Bulldog (something I’ve always wanted). I have a gorgeous home. I own a business. I have memories that no one can take away.
So often we talk ourselves down. We tell ourselves that we aren’t enough, even if those exact words aren’t conveyed. Then we wonder why we’re on this unhappy rollercoaster; why nothing seems to work out. We tell ourselves we aren’t worth it.
I believe that if we spoke to and of ourselves in the best possible way, we’d be astonished by the changes that suddenly happen.. by the people we attract, by the opportunities presented to us.
It all starts with you. No one can make you believe in yourself. You will only be as amazing as you allow yourself to be.